A Weighty Matter Do pounds play a role in how well someone can do his or her job?

In another life — long before I took on this job –– I recall sitting across from a young man who wanted to work for the company that had hired me just a few years before. My boss at the time asked me to join him for a series of interviews with prospective employees.

Things seemed to be going great for this particular college graduate.

He seemed enthusiastic. He exhibited drive. With a couple of internships under his belt, he seemed confident about his prospects of getting a job with us.

It’s still amazing to me now how fast that look of confidence was wiped off his face. It occurred in a matter of nanoseconds.

My boss, in a friendly enough tone, asked him if he thought he would be up to the rigors of the job, which would require long hours and a demanding work load.

Though I don’t remember the words exactly, he said something along the lines of: “With your weight, do you think it will be too much for you physically?”
The guy’s face immediately deflated as he stammered out an answer that somehow managed to indicate that it wouldn’t be a problem.

I was so shocked by the question I didn’t immediately know what to say to soften the blow.

I was embarrassed for the young man, who likely tipped the scales at about 250 pounds or more on a 5-foot-9 or 5-foot-10 frame. I found myself glancing at the wall to avoid facing the painful look on his face.

After all the dust had settled and the guy had left, I recalled thinking, Is it legal to even ask a question like that?

I still don’t know the answer.

But that interview came to mind recently when Judy K., a friend of mine, posed a question on Facebook.

Why, she wanted to know, were so many critics talking about Regina Benjamin’s weight? Media critics have asked if she’s too plump to effectively serve as our newly appointed surgeon general. They’ve asked, “Is she setting the right example for so many Americans who have problems with being overweight or obese?”

Judy K. made the point that C. Everett Koop also carried around some extra pounds — but no one ever made a fuss about his weight. She wanted to know,

“Is it a gender issue?”

Even if it isn’t a gender issue, it is a weighty issue for millions of Americans. My former boss said it outright. Media critics are now talking about it. Should a person’s weight be a factor in deciding how well she or he can do a job?

Let me know what you think...
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by Shari Scales Finnell

Bad Bananas?Or are we all just going bananas? A closer look at the term "Cougar"

I was planning to write a blog this week about the state of affairs in Iraq. Or something weighty about the significance of a smart Latina possibly becoming a U.S. Supreme Court judge.

I really was.

Instead I find myself gravitating toward a very silly, insignificant subject: cougars.

Yep, cougars, but not the kind you’d find caged up in your local zoo. I’m talking about the terminology that’s been overused to describe older women who date much younger men.

I’m writing about cougars because if I hear another crack about cougars chasing after their young prey, I just might roll my eyes right out of my sockets. Like saggy jeans, the term “cougar” just won’t go away.

The latest offense came when a popular radio host (yeah, the same guy just named Indianapolis Woman’s favorite male radio personality) recently commented that being with a cougar was akin to eating a lovely banana only to suddenly discover some brown spots.

Thanks for that description, Mr. Smiley Man.

You’d think we would have gotten over the novelty of an older woman dating much younger men years ago — when Demi Moore started making a happy home with Ashton Kutcher, who is 16 years her junior.

But apparently it’s still so, so, so much more shocking than the age gaps that exist between Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes (47/30); Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones (64/39); Jeff Goldblum and Tania Raymonde (56/21); and Hugh Hefner and whatever dumb bunny happens to be hanging on his arm at any given moment (ancient/still wet-behind-the “bunny” ears).

Despite the hype about all the progress we’re making as a society, an older man and a much younger woman still comes across as the natural order of things — which likely explains why we don’t have a silly term to describe these men.

But flip the script and, apparently, it still comes across as a novelty — a big old hungry cat chasing its prey. Or a bunch of bad bananas thinking they’re hot bananas.

At any rate, I’m starting a petition against our use of that silly little word, cougar.

What do you think?

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by Shari Scales Finnell

Selling Sex... aren't we over this? Writing the Wrongs

Earlier this week I felt a little vindicated when Megan Fox admitted her role in the Transformers movies didn’t have much to do with acting.

As I mentioned in my blog last week, I overacted when my 9-year-old daughter casually mentioned that she thought Fox was a good actress — just after we had seen the Transformers sequel.

Needless to say I went off, a bit terrified that my little girl would actually think of Megan Fox as a role model — someone to look up to. I demanded evidence of Fox’s acting ability. My daughter sort of gave me a blank look that translated to “I wish I had never said a word.”

But it turns out Fox acknowledges she didn’t do much acting.

Fox sparked a bit of a media storm after telling Entertainment Weekly that she wasn’t happy with the lack of depth in her roles. “Working with Michael Bay is not about an acting experience,” the 23-year-old was quoted as saying.

The movie director, in turn, told The Wall Street Journal that Fox “says some very ridiculous things because she’s 23 years old and she still has a lot of growing to do.”
“Nobody in the world knew about Megan Fox until I found her and put her in ‘Transformers,’” Bay added.

Whether it’s just a media ploy to keep her name in the news or not, Fox proved she is no dummy when she brought up this little hot topic. The fact is we are obsessed with looks and sex appeal. And, after decades of thousands of women fighting for respect and equality, it doesn’t seem to be getting any better. Actually, it appears to be worse.

And, sorry, Bay. We all know you were thinking about Fox’s pretty face — not her acting abilities — when you cast her as Mikaela. Which also proves you’re no dummy either.

In these times, sex appeal sells. From the movie screen to the political arena, women continue to be extensively judged by their appearance rather than their abilities.
Just think about it:

> How many women can still command starring roles after they passed the age of 60, let alone 40 and 50, like Paul Newman, Richard Gere and Clint Eastwood? By the way, Richard Gere, who is now 60, was named “Sexiest Man Alive” by People Magazine just 10 years ago — when he was 50. Do you honestly think a woman could muster that honor at the age of 50?

> How many times have we heard about Michelle Obama’s arms and fashion choices, and Sarah Palin’s hairstyle, clothes and “cute” factor?

> How often do we read stories about female singers, actresses and celebrities — like Jessica Simpson putting on a bit of weight? Or, for that matter, losing too much weight?

> How many products are sold — burgers, cars, coffee, etc. — with images of sexy women?

It’s nice to envision a time when we really could get over this double standard when it comes to women.

But let’s face it. We’re all smarter than that. It’s highly unlikely it will ever change. Leave your comments here or on our FaceBook page

by Shari Finnell